Beware of the Masquerade

There is an old mantra, “Keep your friends close but your enemies closer.” Many of us have probably heard this or other similar rants regarding people and friendships. If you explore the discussion of friends in the workplace you will often come across people who are very willing to tell their story about a once beautiful friendship that has gone painfully wrong.

There may be many reasons for this, some of which include: misunderstandings, poorly communicated changes, and unfortunately -jealously. It is one thing to be aware of a problem or grievance with a person, but it is yet another type of situation when people are masquerading themselves as a very close friend, meanwhile they do not have your best interest in mind.

Friends matter, people matter, and relationships that you build matter, what doesn’t matter is trying to please those persons who will never share in your enthusiasm, energy, and success. There will always be someone who doubts you, there will always be someone who is jealous or envious, and there will be someone who pretends to be your friend who is not. Don’t get caught in the masquerade trap, free yourself and stay focused.

Here is the great part. You have the option to take a position, your position. Make the decision to pursue what you believe and you will feel alive, free, and focused. Accept advice, listen to friends, but beware of the masquerade.

It’s a party I’m not attending – are you?

- DEG

Take a Position

Sometimes people believe that taking a position is a dangerous idea. While evaluating the risk of taking a particular position and considering the pros and cons they conclude that the cons outweigh the pros. There may be some circumstances and situations where this perceived risk is real and there may be situations where it is merely a negative fantasy. Despite the potential consequences there may be some benefits to taking a position.

Taking a position may establish new friendships, give you more respect, and result in previously unknown opportunities. Some of this depends on how you evaluate or analyze risk and popular wisdom suggests that there are “two sides” to every story.

Many people take a position on the environment, on politics, and on guns. Taking a position is not necessarily bad. Your position may differ from others or even from “popular” opinion, but taking a position shows you are real and not “playing games” with others ideas or values. Knowing exactly where someone “stands” promotes trust, even if that position differs from your own.

Keep it real – take a position!

- DEG